Me: Oh man, that was the worst tattoo story ever.

Callie: Seriously. I thought she was going to say he died of something fatal.

Callie: Hey. Don’t throw pretzels at me. You know what I meant. Stop laughing.

Callie: What did she say? She didn’t say what I thought she said, did she?

Me: She told me to shut up. And then she said that I don’t do anything around here. That the only thing I do all day is talk to Geo on IM.

Callie: Oh man. Well, now I’m convinced. She’s insane. Because you know what I was thinking? I was thinking that when I grow up, I don’t want to do ANYTHING. So I thought the best way to accomplish that was to have five kids who all have to go to visits and therapy and who spend most of the day screaming like insane people. Because really, Mama Baggage, besides working and taking care of us and cooking and cleaning and laundry and driving, what do you do?? NOTHING.  It’s actually Bug who does everything around here. You should be ashamed.

Izzy: You are joking right?

Callie: Duh.

Did you know you can buy groceries from Amazon.com??

That is so awesome. I have a few gift certificates from them that I haven’t used yet and now I can buy food and diapers and laundry soap with them.

Did everyone know that except me? When I lived in California, we used to do all our grocery shopping online…I wish that was an option here. I hate going to the store, especially with Snowbaby who has a nervous breakdown each time we go.

Do you ever look at yourself and wonder how you can be so ecstatic over spending your gift certificates on baby wipes?

*******

Happy Father’s Day Dad! I love you. Thanks for being a grandpa to Callie, Bug, Snowbaby and Bubba without any hesitation.

*******

Callie made my dad and Geo cards for Father’s Day. She did it out of the blue and worked very hard to make them personalized. Inside both she wrote:

“Thanks for excepting me into your family”

*******

Bubba: I want to call Anna.

Me: Ok. (Rings) Nana isn’t home.

Bubba: I want to call Dad.

Me: Ok. (Rings..he’s busy.) Sorry buddy, Dad can’t talk now.

Bubba: I want to call PawPaw.

Me: Ok. (Rings) PawPaw isn’t home.

Bubba: Call someone else.

Me: Um..How about Aunt K?

Bubba: Yes. Aunt K.

Me: (Rings) Uh-oh. She isn’t home. How about Uncle B?

Bubba: Yes. Uncle B.

Me: (Rings) He’s not home either honey.

Bubba: Call God.

Me: God? I don’t know if God has a phone.

Bubba: No. Don’t want to talk to God. I want to talk to Anna’s Dog.

Me: Nana’s Dog?

Bubba: Yeah! Call Anna’s Dog Mommy. Tell Anna’s Dog I go swimming in pool. Tell Anna’s Dog 1-2-1-2-1-2. Call Anna’s Dog Mom. I tell Anna’s Dog to come see me.

Me: Um. I don’t know if Nana’s Dog is available.

Bubba: I leave a message.

Callie: So get this. I stayed up late playing Sims last night. And me and this dude lived together and we had a baby. And somehow my Sim girl got really tired and she would not get out of bed. If I got her out of bed, she would fall down on the floor.

Me: Oh man.

Callie: Yeah, and then DFS showed up and they took my baby!

Bug: Hey! That’s messed up.

Callie: I know, right? They didn’t even give me a chance to work my case plan!

Callie is biracial. Here in Small Town, no one thinks we are together. It doesn’t matter if we walk up to the counter together, if she is holding Snowbaby, if we are talking.

Every single cashier/waitress/yard sale lady acts surprised when I say that I’m paying for her things. They say, “Oh, I didn’t know she was with you.” “Oh..you are paying for her things?”

It bothers Callie. It bothers me.

Callie says that a lot. “I don’t mean to sound stupid but…” She said it last night after she cried and she said it today when she was saying she was excited about the day we have planned for tomorrow.

I’ve been reassuring her that expressing how she feels is not stupid at all.

We had a good food day today. I’ve been encouraging her to help me come up with meals that she would like. Today she wanted chicken stir fry, so we went to the store together and got the stuff. Bug was not at all impressed, but Callie ate the whole thing with a smile on her face. Callie also spent a good deal of time going through my cookbooks and marking down recipes that she thought she would like.

I’m trying to get her involved in the meal decisions. I’m not sure how much truth there is to the list of foods she doesn’t like, but I also know I went through periods of time where I hated certain foods, like Ranch dressing. You also have to remember she came from one home where I’m sure they ate different things than we eat. Moving to a new home is difficult. She has to get used to what we eat, and what we drink, and what we like. And of course, she is also a teenage girl who would like to lose some weight. It is a delicate balance.

And of course, what the hell do I know? I’ve never parented an almost 16 year old. Sometimes I wonder how in the world I ended up being mom to a 15, 11, 3 and 2 year old. No freaking idea. So much of parenting is a crap shoot anyway. What works with one kid doesn’t with the other. What should be effective isn’t because your kid is in foster care. But I’ve noticed that I’m definitely a lot more confident in my parenting skills than I was a year ago. Which is good, I guess, since I’m now responsible for a lot more people!

***

Building up some good nutrition habits in children early can help them throughout their lives

Bug’s team: 0 wins, 2 losses

BUT! Bug did good! She got a hit! She scored! Right now their team is machine pitch, but they will be switching over to live pitch soon. We all think Bug has potential to be a good pitcher, so she played the position of “pitcher” last night, where the machine pitches but she fields the ball. And she did good. My Dad talked to her once about talking back to him, and I said something to her once about doing attention-seeking behavior with the other coach, but other than that she did good. I’m proud of the little muchkin.

Thanks for your house rules too! I’m still trying to figure out what to do in regards to the Callie situation. There is more too it, as well, because she tends to not eat in order to lose weight. So I think part of the “I don’t like this” issue has to do with her trying to get out of eating meals. Which obviously is not good. Callie had a major breakdown last night, just sobbing her eyes out. In some ways I’m glad, because she felt comfortable enough to express how she felt, and although she didn’t want to talk at first, she did open up and talk about why she was sad. Which is progress.

Oh! I get to give something away to you folks! There is a new show on HBO called Flight of the Conchords.

About the show:

Flight of the Conchords follows the trials and tribulations of a two man, digi-folk band from New Zealand as they try to make a name for themselves in their adopted home of New York City. The band is made up of Bret McKenzie on guitar and vocals, and Jemaine Clement on guitar and vocals.

Bret and Jemaine have moved to New York in the hope of forging a successful music career. So far they’ve managed to find a manager (whose “other” job is at the New Zealand Consulate), one fan (a married obsessive) and one friend (who owns the local pawn shop) — but not much else.

You can watch the full first episode on the website.

If you are the lucky winner you get:

1 Robot Stress Reliever

1 DVD of the 1st episode

1 Poster

1 Tshirt

1 Postcard

And the overwhelming joy that comes from knowing you won. To enter, all you have to do is leave a comment on this post. About anything. Bug will pick the winner next Friday, June 1st.

Good Luck!

*** Read up on various brands of softball equipment before you spend lots of money.

Boy you guys have a lot of questions!

Here are some quick answers:

Does your DFS do anything like lifebooks, so she at least has a little of her history to take with her? 

Foster parents are supposed to start one within 30 days of the kid’s arrival. Callie does not have one.

I know you never told Butterfly about the blog, will you tell Callie?

Probably not. Maybe that I write for a website. I probably will not write a lot about her on here for that reason.

Does Callie have siblings elsewhere?

Yes.

How long has she been in the system? 

About a year and a half.

When you were originally approved to foster your house was certified for 4 kids (if memory serves), now that you have a bigger house, can you take more than 4?  Does the 4 include Bug?

I am licensed for six children. I think that includes Bug.

Would you take more if they were offered?

If the circumstances were right. I’ve talked to DFS about the kind of kids who would fit in here at this point. It would just really depend on a lot of things..the kids, their issues, how the other kids were doing at the time, what the plan for the case was.

How long will callie be with you?

I have no idea.

Is there any hopes of reunification?

Maybe. Not a very strong chance.

With the age difference, will she and bug share a room, or will the rooms
stay seperated as they were when butterfly was there?

Separate. Bug and Callie have their own rooms and the little ones share a room.

How are the little guy and snow baby doing without butterfly there, and have you heard any additional reports in regards to her mental stability or long term
placement/reunification goals?

They are doing just fine. They have really not said anything about her being gone. I figure they assume their life is messed up as it is, so they are not surprised. I talked a little bit about the other part of the question a few posts back. The goal for these kids is still reunification.

Will this make it harder on her parents to get the other two back as well or will that not play into it?

Again, I talked about this a little ways back, but no..not really. The main goal is addressing the reasons the kids were taken into care in the first place and making sure the services that have been started for them are continued. Their behavior problems and delays were not why the came into care. There were other substantial reasons which have to be addressed before they would be allowed to go home.

OK, I have a busy day of running around today and a birthday to celebrate, so I’m off. Feel free to ask any other questions, like why McDreamy is so damn inconsistent? Bad writing? It is hard to love Patrick Dempsey as much when his character is such an ass.

Bug: Don’t worry Callie. Mommy is a really good cook. And she knows EVERYTHING.

*****

Callie came with all her belongings in a black trashbag. It only was halfway filled. She was very excited to get a Pirates of the Carribean comforter with matching sheets. Posters of Chris Brown and Justin Timberlake are on her wall. She loves jigsaw puzzles.

So far so good.

Callie is my new foster daughter. She is 15 and has been in foster care for awhile. I’ve had some pretty extensive conversations with people involved with her. All have described her as very likeable, well-behaved, intelligent, friendly, and void of any behavioral issues, other than typical 15 year old stuff. She doesn’t smoke, doesn’t get in trouble at school, and does will with other children. Her only main issue is that she has dealt with some depression which is understandable given her circumstances.

The hope is that I can be a good role model for her and that she will be a good role model for Bug.

She’ll be here tomorrow.