Superman lover lemaris-Superman Vol 2 12 | DC Database | FANDOM powered by Wikia

Especially when his love of undersea "spooning" wins him the throne of Atlantis, too. Comic book fans are always going to have different reactions when DC writers remind us that Superman has sex, whether it's with his wife Lois or a trip back to Clark Kent's farmboy adolescence. While it may not be the origin story Superman fans had in mind, Miller made a point of telling the story of Clark and his high school girlfriend Lana Lang losing their virginity--a completely normal, typical, and unsurprising detail usually left out of the narrative. But after leaving Smallville for training as a Navy SEAL , a one-way ticket into a mermaid's bed sure is a heck of a twist. But the weirdest part of Superman's new sexual conquest is that it isn't Miller's invention

Superman lover lemaris

Superman lover lemaris

Superman lover lemaris

Chris lovee returned as a teenager under the guise of Nightwing. The Hollywood My nake. In Superman 44 Junethe couple buries the hatchet and begin dating and fall in love. This is Superman lover lemaris the worst way to discover Superman lover lemaris wife is starring in Superman-porn, and how we want every plot twist to be revealed from now on. When they investigate the craft, they discover the baby Kal-El and decide to raise him as their lovwr, naming him Clark Jerome Kent. These cookies track usage of the site for security, analytics and targeted advertising purposes. Oxford University Press. Languages Add links. Lois is still grieving over Clark's death and is writing puff pieces for the Daily Planet. Jess Nevins's Annotations's website.

Transexual stacey. Legal Ownership

By using this Superman lover lemaris, you agree to the Terms of Use and Privacy Policy. Retrieved June 11, Superman awkwardly admits to having thought about Diana constantly since first meeting her, even admitting to having had an "intense" dream about her. All data collected through our Website is stored on servers located in the United States. Though we make every effort to preserve user privacy, we may need to disclose personal information when required by law wherein we have a good-faith belief that such action is necessary to comply with a current judicial proceeding, a court order or legal process served on any of our sites. Action Comics Superman Supergirl. Hawkman and Hawkgirl - Fresh fucker duo of lovers Spain spanking sites extraordinary powers who are doomed to watch each other die and be reincarnated through time. London : Dorling Kindersley. They are included here to Superman lover lemaris complete. Apparently dead.

It's come to this.

  • It's come to this.
  • Lois Lane of Earth
  • For whatever else can be said about the second issue of Superman: Year One, at least it manages to bring something new to the table in a way the first issue didn't.
  • Many of the characters listed below may no longer be in current continuity, or may have been written out of the stories altogether.

Especially when his love of undersea "spooning" wins him the throne of Atlantis, too. Comic book fans are always going to have different reactions when DC writers remind us that Superman has sex, whether it's with his wife Lois or a trip back to Clark Kent's farmboy adolescence.

While it may not be the origin story Superman fans had in mind, Miller made a point of telling the story of Clark and his high school girlfriend Lana Lang losing their virginity--a completely normal, typical, and unsurprising detail usually left out of the narrative. But after leaving Smallville for training as a Navy SEAL , a one-way ticket into a mermaid's bed sure is a heck of a twist. But the weirdest part of Superman's new sexual conquest is that it isn't Miller's invention That includes Clark being lured to sea from his San Diego naval base by the siren call of mermaids on the horizon Her name is eventually revealed to be 'Lori Lemaris,' a re-imagined version of Clark's college girlfriend first appearing in Superman May In Superman's original canon, he actually proposed to Lori before discovering they were fated to live above and below the surface.

While Clark and Lori are never actually SHOWN to make love leaving several questions permanently unanswered the narration leaves little doubt that Clark Kent may be from Krypton, but he has the same Earthly desires as anyone:. As alluded to above, this second part of Miller and Romita's origin story concludes with Superman and Lori engaging in a 'celebratory' kiss, having been handed the throne of Atlantis as a couple.

That's expected to change, but DC fans will need to wait for the final chapter to see what last bombshells are still on the way. Readers can check out the full solicitation details and the plot synopsis for Superman: Year One below:. We and our trusted partners use cookies and tracking technologies to create custom content for your enjoyment and to provide advertising in line with your interests.

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Lois Lane of Earth Superman finds himself stranded on Krypton in the past in the aptly named "Superman's Return to Krypton! Thaddeus Killgrave - A scientific weapons mastermind, responsible for attempting to nuke Superman. Atlantic Records , Per Ricca , p.

Superman lover lemaris

Superman lover lemaris

Superman lover lemaris

Superman lover lemaris

Superman lover lemaris

Superman lover lemaris. Who's Who in the Superman Comics

Superman wants to arrest Batman while Wonder Woman wants to kill him. It's implied the two have romantic feelings for one another, but the issue over what to do with Batman leads to a heated argument The late Mike Wieringo must have been a fan of Superman and Wonder Woman being romantically involved, drawing this wonderful piece of art inked by Richard Case showing the two in a mid-air embrace [pictured above].

The pairing of Superman and Wonder Woman was even the subject of a series of greeting cards for birthdays and valentine's day. I also found a photo of an unlicensed pin made in China that was sold on Ebay showing the two embracing. Whatever your feelings about Superman and Wonder Woman being romantically involved, the story of this new relationship has garnered much publicity.

How long it lasts is anyone's guess. How Lois Lane will feel about it remains to be seen. I hear people are already taking bets on how long until we see this happen His real name is Chuck Taine. He has the power to inflate his body and bounce. Brainiac - A sentient alien machine created on the planet Colu. He is virtually as powerful as the Man of Steel. Being a machine, he is cold and emotionless and often uses Superman's emotions against him.

His power is his 12th level intellect. He invented the Legion flight ring. Brainiac 13 - A future evolved evil Brainiac who uses future technology B13 tech to take control of Metropolis at the turn of the 20th Century. Braverman used his knowledge of Clark Kent's secret to threaten Clark's loved ones as the costumed villain Conduit. Brother Eye - Technology created by Batman which gained sentience and created the O.

Cadmus Project - A shadowy scientific organization that operated underneath Metropolis for some time. Their main research is in cloning and weaponry. Project Cadmus' scientists include the grown up original members of the Newsboy Legion. Cadmus's former director of operations Westfield initiated the cloning operation that created Superboy Connor Kent.

Their former Newsboy Legion scientists have even cloned an entire new modern Newsboy Legion. Fought Luthor's desire to rework Suicide Slum into a metroplex. Captain Atom - A military hero, Captain Atom is invulnerable, has solid metal skin, and can fire nuclear energy blasts. As Monarch, Atom killed many people, but he has reappeared claiming he wasn't in control of himself at the time.

Affiliated himself with the President Luthor administration as Secretary of Defense. Carapax - A scientist fused into a suit of alien armor.

A former rival of Blue Beetle. Catwoman - Selina Kyle, cat burglar and anti-hero, and romantic foil for the Batman. Catwoman has crossed hairs with the Man of Steel on several occasions. She sacrifices one of her fellow Kryptonians in order to get closer to General Lane and his operations. Cave Carson - A famous explorer known for adventuring. Carson is a master spelunker and inventor. Once belonged to the "Forgotten Heroes" who teamed up with Superman.

Cerberus - A strange villain with the ability to attach heads to its body. Ceritak - Real name of blue alien Scorn. In Greek mythology, Circe attracted men to her island then turned them into beasts. He is a natural shape shifter from the planet Durla. Checkmate - An international cartel dedicated to maintaining order in a world with superheroes. Checkmate was once ruled over by Maxwell Lord who used his hypnotic telepathy to take control of Superman, which left Wonder Woman with no choice but to sacrifice Lord's life on live television.

As Super-Girl, Cir-El ultimately sacrificed her life to prevent the future time line that spawned her. Circle, The - Enhanced humans who believe themselves God's first creations. Clan MacHinery, The - A clan of villains, Scottish engineers who uploaded their consciousness into robots.

Cleric - A Kryptonian cleric who preached against cloning, and gave Superman the Eradicator. He has the power to grow to tremendous size. Married to Chameleon Girl. Colu - Home planet of the Computer Tyrants who created Brainiac. Conduit - Kenny Braverman, formerly Clark's friend from Smallville, used his knowledge of Clark Kent's secret identity to threaten Superman's closest friends. Conduit accidentally killed himself. Presumed dead. Cosmic Boy - Rokk Krin of the planet Braal. Has the natural power to control magnetism.

Along with the two other founders, Cosmic Boy traveled to late 20th Century Smallville to meet young Clark Kent and ultimately invited him to join the Legion in the future as a time-traveling Superboy. Ryder has worked in a variety of media over the years and has found himself both allied with and foils for Lois and Clark. Cyborg Superman - Hank Henshaw, a former astronaut, was imbued with radiation along with his family of space travelers during a space shuttle flight.

The radiation slowly killed them all and drove Henshaw mad. Now able to control and manipulate cybernetics and metals, his disembodied self found and assimilated with Kryptonian metals and Superman's DNA to become the Cyborg Superman.

Unable to die. Destroyed Coast City. Allied with the Sinestro Corps. Hates Superman, and tries to discredit him. Czarnia - Home planet of intergalactic bounty hunter Lobo. Lobo is the "Last Czarnian" because he killed everyone else on the planet. At times has been taken over by Lex Luthor, but always comes back.

Known for Perry White's editing and the globe on top of the building, as well as being Clark Kent and Lois Lane's masthead.

Darkseid - The all-powerful ruler of Apokolips. A fascist despot who craves only power, on a power base similar to Supermans. She served as the second-in-command to Kal-El in the Red Shard unit. Dominus - A reality-shifting villain who tried to attack Superman by warping his sense of reality several times. Doomsday - A genetic killing machine built on ancient Krypton, Doomsday returns to life after dying adapted to the thing that killed him, making him nearly invulnerable.

Once killed Superman. The only meta superhero now a villain on the planet is Superboy Prime. Morgan Edge - A media pundit known for his slanted, biased reporting. In the pocket of Project Eradicator - Formerly the entity designed to rebuild Krypton in the wake of its destruction, the Eradicator became a humanoid that battled Superman with Kryptonian powers on several occasions.

His current origin is thought changed, but hasn't yet been implemented. F Ferro - A deformed hero who has helped Superman at varying times, with varying degrees of success. Flash - The fastest man alive, Barry Allen, has recently returned from the dead to fight for justice.

Both aid Superman and race him on a regular basis. Fortress of Solitude - Superman's home base, a Kryptonian repository and museum where he keeps mementos from his battles and comes to be alone. Often destroyed and rebuilt. Traditionally located in the Arctic. Jeb Friedman - A former suitor of Lois Lane, killed protecting her while at the same time vying to steal her from Clark.

Funky Flashman - A nefarious business promoter who often seeks to capitalize off the Man of Steel. Futuresmiths - Mysterious beings from the future who used an alternate version of Supergirl in an attempt to defeat Superman. Gangbuster - Disgusted with the urban blight and community consequences of gangs, Jose Delgado armed himself and took to the streets to take on the gang problem head-on. An ally of Superman's. Giganta - A villain whose powers include her ability to grow to enormous size.

Gog - An ancient deity of the third world and a biblical figure in many apocalypse scenarios. Created MaGog, a mortal enemy of Superman's at some point in the "Kingdom" future, as a herald. Gotham City - The home of Batman, a dark city in contrast to Metropolis. Commander Gor - A near-fascist military guild member on New Krypton.

Known for killing human authority figures. Nearly executed protesting members of the Labor Guild before Superman had him stopped. An adversary. Cat Grant - A tabloid style columnist emotionally damaged by the death of her son. A spiteful and vindictive figure, Cat has had plastic surgery to supplement her need for attention and often seeks to undermine Supergirl. Green Lanterns - A team of galactic guardians who wield green power rings. There are two for each sector of space, and outside of diplomatic problems, often ally with Superman to face space problems.

Guardian - Jim Harper, formerly the protector of the Newsboy Legion at Cadmus, escaped his former life and lived peacefully away from society, until called back by the new threat of Project and his conscience.

Armed with an indestructible shield, he leads the Science Police. H Professor Emil Hamilton - A brilliant scientist, Emil Hamilton's shifting loyalties led to him being Superman's enemy, then his ally, and then his enemy again, when he adopted the persona of Ruin. Insane and violent, he nearly sent Pete Ross to prison. Hector Hammond - A Green Lantern villain who has the telepathic ability to manipulate minds, granted by a piece of meteor. Hawkman and Hawkgirl - A duo of lovers with extraordinary powers who are doomed to watch each other die and be reincarnated through time.

Talia Head - The daughter of Ra's Al Ghul, a political force to be reckoned with and a diabolical fighter. Associated typically with Batman. Hellgrammite - A bug-like nemesis of Superman who often dwells in shadowy places.

Hope - Hope Taya was one of Lex Luthor's former bodyguards. Of late she has been relocated to parts unknown. Huntress - A member of the Batman Family who frequently seeks to fight mafia targets. Hyathis - An extraterrestrial matriarch figure who figures strongly into space storylines involving Thanagar. Imperiex - A malevolent entity that came from deep in space with "probes" in an attempt to remake the universe. Inspired the "Black S" Superman shield. Intergang - Metropolis' major mafia organization.

Interlac - An intergalactic form of communication used by many alien species. J Jackal - A renegade anti-hero who kills those he considers to be evil. Jax-Ur - Destroyed one of Krypton's moons attempting space travel, causing Brainiac to come to Krypton. Hid on Earth in the guise of Dr. Pillings as a Zod sleeper agent. Saved Chris Kent from burst aging. Barbara Johnson - A religious woman who believes Superman to be an angel. He heralded the death of Krypton before it occurred, and was mocked.

Placed his son Kal into a rocket and sent him to Earth. Perished with his wife Lara when Krypton exploded. Joker - Batman's arch-nemesis, a crazed clown whose unpredictable murderous actions make his every action crazy and deadly. They reformed to teach the new generation, and serve in the same capacity as the Justice League to combat larger threats. Mid-Nite, and Mr. K Kal-El - Superman's Kryptonian birth name. Kalibak - An agent of Darkseid known for his brutal fury and battle prowess.

Kandor - Once a Kryptonian city. Kandor was captured by Brainiac, who shrank it and kept it inside a "bottle", to represent Krypton before its destruction.

Survives to become the foundation of New Krypton. Kara Zor-El - Supergirl's Kryptonian birth name. Jonathan Kent - Clark Kent's adoptive father, a strong moral figure. Killed indirectly by a Brainiac missile strike when he suffered a catastrophic heart attack. Clark Joseph Kent - Superman's secret identity. Martha Kent - Clark Kent's adoptive mother, also a strong moral figure.

Has mentored many of Superman's contemporaries, and is known for crafting great superhero uniforms and pie. Khyber - An ancient powerful deity who rose to face Superman recently before retreating to hide again after his defeat at Superman's hands.

Wears a tall blue hat. Khyrana - A seductress cursed by Zeus to forever be "unsatisfied. Kismet - A galactic force that tries to hide itself from Dominus, ultimately an aid in winning the Imperiex War. Koko - Brainiac's evil pet monkey. Do not taunt or feed. Krypto - Superman's dog, sent out as a test of Superman's rocket. Eventually arrived on Earth, where Superman reclaimed him.

Krypton - Superman's home planet, destroyed by a cause currently unknown, but presumably involving Brainiac. Kryptonite - Radiated chunks of Krypton after it exploded. Comes in many colors, green deadly , red creates strange mutations , yellow removes powers temporarily , blue deadly to bizarros , black creates split personalities. Kryptonite Man - K. Russell Abernathy, a scientist working with Kryptonite, is caught in a blast and imbued with Kryptonite based powers and super-strength.

Often fights for the underdog beyond her abilities, and often gets into trouble thereby, requiring Superman's help. Daughter of Sam Lane. Lucy Lane - Lois Lane's sister. Formerly married to Ron Troupe with a son , this has been ret-conned. Now she works for Sam Lane and adopts the persona of Superwoman before seemingly dying in an accident at Supergirl's hands, though she may have survived. Sam Lane - A xenophobic speciesist with a profound dedication to his planet, General Sam Lane controls powerful military resources in an attempt to stop alien invasion.

Runs Project , and is not averse to using deception and murder to promote his cause. Father of Lois and Lucy Lane. Lana Lang - Clark Kent's first love in Metropolis, and also one of the first outside of his family to learn of his powers. Lara - Jor-El's wife and Kal-El's mother. Legion of Super Heroes - A group of heroes in the far-flung future the 3,s inspired by Superman's exploits to do good.

Often they tamper with time to prevent catastrophic events. Father Daniel Leone - A dying priest who enlists Superman's help with his plight. Lobo - A space bounty hunter, and the toughest bastich out there.

Maxwell Lord - A former leader of the JLA who became militantly evil over time and headed Checkmate, a paramilitary organization that sought to prevent metahuman superiority. Killed by Wonder Woman when he would not relinquish mental control of Superman. LexCom - Lex Luthor's internet foray. LexCorp - Lex Luthor's company, founded with money he made killing his father, Lionel. Often changes hands, and in crisis since Luthor's imprisonment following his presidency.

Steve Lombard - The sports reporter for the Daily Planet. A blowhard, but essentially a good person. Loophole - An inefficient villain who uses teleportation to rob, but often gets caught in his own tools. Alexander Luthor - Can be an alternate personality of the New Earth Lex Luthor who wants to do good, or it can also be the "good" Lex Luthor of an alternate universe, now deceased after Infinite Crisis.

Confined to a wheelchair. Lex Luthor - The greatest criminal mind of our time. The only sitting president to be removed via fighting Superman in a giant green and purple suit. A bald man bent on world domination with an extremely high IQ.

Superman's greatest enemy. Lionel Luthor - Lex Luthor's alcoholic father, killed by Lex in a bid for insurance money. Depicted as abusive and evil, and likely the source of Lex's nature. M Magog - The herald of Gog, a former member of the US military who may or may not become the reason Superman quits in the future, according to the Kingdom Come story.

Mainframe - Led by Override, Mainframe is a technologically based group of criminal masterminds. Majestic - The "Wildstorm" Superman analogue. Mammoth - A brutal, but stupid villain who fought Superman during the Krisis of the Krimson Kryptonite. Manchester Black - A scorched earth "hero" who ultimately worked with nefarious forces to fight Superman until he was killed. Student of the Crime Bible. Recently killed in Final Crisis. Massacre - A villain Superman encounters in space who ultimately comes to Earth to fight him.

Died in Our Worlds At War to save the universe. Master Jailer - A reformed villain who specialized in creating inescapable traps for Superman. Now working with Checkmate. Meta-gene - The gene responsible for people being gifted with powers. Metal Men - A team of robots made from major metals. Allies of the Justice League. Metallo - The man with a kryptonite heart, John Corben is a cyborg who detests Superman.

He's appeared in many incarnations, including one with each of five colors of kryptonite powering his body. Metropolis - Superman's home city, an analogue for the real-world New York.

Metropolis Generals - Metropolis' baseball franchise. Metropolis Mammoths - Metropolis' hockey team. Metropolis Meteors - Another pro baseball team in Metropolis. There is also a pro football team called the Meteors. Metropolis Metros - Another Metropolis pro football team. Metropolis Monarchs - Another Metropolis pro baseball team. Metropolis Union Station - The major travel hub for Metropolis, and the origin point for the "rail whale. Misa - A former member of the Superman revenge squad, a psychedelic themed villain.

Mongal - Mongul's evil sister. Mongul - An evil warlord responsible for the destruction of Coast City. A member of the Sinistro Corps until he tried to take leadership. Destined to be trapped in the Phantom Zone for a thousand years as a result of lead poisoning. Mxyzptlk - A magical imp from the 5th dimension that plagues Superman every 90 days with pranks and insight. The only way he can be defeated is by having Superman trick him into saying his name backwards.

N National Whisper, The - Metropolis' tabloid newspaper. Neutron - The living bomb, a low-level B character with an orange suit. Appears infrequently and often as an easy takedown. NewsTime Magazine - A major Metropolis publication. Reported on Superman's death. Nightwing Nightwing and Flamebird - Chris Kent's adopted hero identity while tracking down Zod's sleeper agents. Also a mystical Kryptonian hero figure. Not to be confused with the Batman character of the same name.

Yes, Superman Has Sex With a Mermaid in His New Origin

It's come to this. Superman sex. The sheer magnitude of Superman's love-making is crucial to the overarching plot of Garth Ennis' The Boys and at least two Kevin Smith films. There's even an essay by Larry Niven appropriately titled "Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex" getting into the raw physics of how Superman bangs. Don't deny it. To qualify for this list, individuals had to have sex with a Superman and survive.

However, since Supes is so wholesome, we have widened our degenerate gaze to include alternate versions of Superman.

Superman clones also count, no matter their sexy imperfections, ergo both Superboy and Bizarro qualify. For the sake of saving time and sanity: Bizarro dates a painstakingly customized stack of rocks and twigs he calls Lois. There, we just spared the world words centered around a Bizarro Real Doll. We have to start this listicle off with an honorary nod to Lex Luthor, who has basically done everything but go all the way with Big Blue. Aside from not so coincidentally sporting the obligatory L.

Is Superboy a genetically engineered super-weapon? Or a genetically engineered super-romantic gesture? Regardless, Luthor gets an "A" for effort, even if he didn't technically get any "A" in the sheets. Ultraman is a Superman who hails from a mirrored Earth identical to ours in every way in Forever Evil by Geoff Johns and David Finch, except everyone is such a dick. From Jor-Il telling baby Clark not to demean himself with Earth women, to Ma and Pa Kent being junkies, everything from Ultraman's world is hilariously horrible.

Ultraman's main squeeze in this universe is Superwoman, his world's amalgam Wonder Woman and Lois Lane. Ultraman would rather kill Superwoman, only staying with her because she is the sole individual with the physique suitable enough to carry his child. With the world potentially ending in hours, the two Titans look over scrapbooks of their roots, garish '90s outfits and all.

Connor has just enough flight left in him to take himself and Cassie somewhere where they can be normal for a moment, traveling to the Kent family farm in Smallville -- which in retrospect is the quintessential Superman hookup move.

To ensure Superboy doesn't die a super-virgin, Wonder Girl consummates their relationship and pops Connor Kent's Kryptonian cherry in the barn, granting Connor a genuine moment of happiness before dying an ignoble, litigious-based death during the Infinite Crisis finale.

During the Young Justice animated series, Superboy and Miss Martian commiserate over being the sole members of their species overflowing with hormones. The two share their first kiss while masquerading as the Terror Twins, earning an apropos "Dude! That's your sister! J'onn J'onzz explains it is a romantic game between Martians -- provided that each consenting member knows the other's true form.

We've never dated a shapeshifter before, but let's just assume that you don't shape-shift into your boyfriend's CQC instructor until well after the third date. Maxima wants to marry Superman via trial by combat, explaining that she can offer Superman something that no other woman can -- the ability to carry his children. Kinda lame that the primary motivation of one of the first strong female superman villains is to have his babies. Maxima gets Superman on the rebound after Lois dies due to internal bleeding when her unborn super-baby kicks her to death in the womb in Adventures of Superman Annual 3 by L.

Maxima is genetically compatible with Clark, however, as she ponders on what wonderful children they would've had together. So yeah, Maxima was totally right about that one. That being said, it was a tad gauche of them to make out on top of Lois' grave. A Superman missing both his shirt and memories is whisked into wedding Lola-La, princess of a dinosaur island during the subtly titled Blackout saga in Superman Vol 2 62 by Dan Jurgens.

The two don't speak the same language, but Lola-La is basically an off-color She-Hulk, so Superman is cool with it. Naturally, Lois Lane stops the ceremony before getting into a hair-pulling match with Lola-La. Superman contemplates intervening, but his instincts tell him to just let this girl-fight go on, indefinitely. Incidentally, this story starts in media res, presumably after Superman has been missing for what just has to be days of boning.

Do you really think they waited for marriage? Because when you wake up on a dinosaur island with your entire mental library of pornography erased, procreation is your top priority next to avoiding velociraptor-based oblivion. Lori attended classes by utilizing a wheelchair and blanket not unlike a sexy FDR. When Lori reveals that she has to end their relationship to return home, Clark is ready to lock Lori down, prepared to both marry her and abandon being Superman.

Upon discovering that Lori has a tank of salt water instead of a bed, Superman deduces that she must be a mermaid. That's right: Isolation chambers aren't real. Everyone is merfolk. Stranger Things lied to you. Anyway, this was all a roundabout excuse for why Superman wouldn't propose to Lois: mermaid heartbreak, or whatever.

Clark dances with popular girl Misty, who deduces that Clark is Superboy. After Misty assures Clark that he can trust her, they embrace in wordless silhouette. Ma Kent confirms the nasty: "Clark's bed is still made! I wish he wouldn't go out on these all-night patrols! Such love was never meant to be, ripped apart when a roaming pack of sasquatches no-scope headshot Misty with a precisely flung rock to the temple.

In fact, Misty is just some girl that Super-Teacher thought Clark would find hot, "programmed" brainwashed with Superboy's favorite personality traits. With the test complete, Misty's memory is wiped before she is returned to whichever town Super-Teacher kidnapped her from. Taking the time to bury his wallet and costume just before some Red Kryptonite-based amnesia kicks in, an exhausted Superman just so happens to stumble upon the Selwyn mansion grounds, where he meets millionaire heiress Sally Selwyn.

Sally nurses a power-sapped Superman back to health and into her bed in "The Sweetheart Superman Forgot! Sorta weird that the second Superman has to be a normal person, this time going as Jim White, he winds up with a millionaire for a girlfriend.

Gee, that Superman sure is lucky. What's legitimately weird though is that in May 's Superman , Sally recounts that Jim Superman became paralyzed and confined to a wheelchair after getting thrown off by a bronco in a rodeo -- 31 years before Christopher Reeve's similar May injury. Come for the super-sex, leave with your soul feeling spooky. Superman finds himself stranded on Krypton in the past in the aptly named "Superman's Return to Krypton!

The two split some pills and before long they're celebrating their love in the Rainbow Canyon, which is some solid innuendo. Superman's desires, as it turns out, is to be a normal Kryptonian man, living together with his wife Lyla and their son, Van.

All in all Seriously, when's the last time Batman even tried to get Superman laid? Clark had to go through four seasons of Smallville just to finally sleep with Lana in Season Five.

That's 89 episodes comprised of bulimic vampires, Lana banging the jock who literally crucified Superman, Kryptonite tattoos, Kryptonite truth serum, Kryptonite love potion, Kryptonite ghosts and like, an entire character arc of Lana going through some witch-nonsense.

Incidentally, after they do it Lana saps some of Clark's superpowers. Totally worth it. Sleez's plan is to use the profits from the super-pornos to finance his army, which is definitely a lie. But nope -- Sleez gotta sleaze. The best part is that this is all revealed to Mr. Miracle by Darkseid, who hands Mr. Miracle Barda's first videotape while sipping on cognac in a sweet chair. This is easily the worst way to discover your wife is starring in Superman-porn, and how we want every plot twist to be revealed from now on.

Lois Lane being the sole human that Superman wants to bang has been a plot point for countless Superman series. In Injustice, the Joker murdering a pregnant Lois is what drives Superman to become a despot.

Superman just rage-quits on humanity when Lois dies in Kingdom Come. In All-Star Superman by Grant Morrison, Superman gives Lois a super serum that allows her to experience his powers for 24 hours, basically the superhero equivalent of a couple trying ecstasy. As Diana vents her problems about her boring, basic boyfriend Steve, and Clark expresses the difficulty he has connecting to humanity, the two heroes realize they're not so alone in the world, stealing a kiss from one another in Justice League 12 by Geoff Johns and Scott Williams.

Batman watching over his teammates doing it shouldn't come as a surprise to anyone. The man is all about contingency plans, and we will bet all of our Yu-Gi-Oh! Superman has been brainwashed to believe that he is Darkseid's adopted son in "Legacy" from Superman: The Animated Series. We're not even being clever: Lashina strokes Clark's chin after he returns from a campaign, declaring it time for a "celebration. Lashina is Clark's favorite, but everyone gets to ride the Supermobile.

Later, Lashina greets Clark with "Welcome back Lover, give us a kiss! To recap: the only Superman orgy ever originally premiered on Kids WB.

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