Dear DFS-September
Hiya!! It’s me! Baggage!
I know you are real busy and all, but I **had** to write. I just found out that you paid me for this month!! WOW! That was SO nice of you!! I totally wasn’t expecting it. Honest! I swear! I don’t expect you to pay me anything. But you did it anyway, because you are SO THOUGHTFUL!!
I know that you were too busy to adjust my subsidy or pay me for my back pay, respite or mileage. But hey! It’s OK!! I wasn’t expecting it! Besides, what is $1500 between friends??
Matter of fact, one of the kids today asked me if we could go do up to the mall this weekend and buy some things and I was SHOCKED! I mean, honestly! The nerve of these kids!! I said, “Listen up! Stop being so ungrateful! The state has already rescued you from your miserable little lives! How can you expect them to actually PROVIDE for you now? Haven’t they done enough for you?? Sheesh! It is obvious why you are in foster care..your parents never taught you any manners! Now say “THANK YOU” to the nice social worker and stop EXPECTING things all the time!”
Anyway, thank you for all you do!! You are so great!!!
Love always, your BFF,
Baggage
P.S. OMG! I totally forgot! Thanks so much for the letter saying that I get to take mandatory CPR all day on a Saturday! How fun!! And don’t worry about not providing any arrangements for childcare! I’m sure I can find a finger-printed, background checked childcare provider for five children on Saturday with no problem!! See ya then!!!
September 14th, 2007 at 7:27 am
Damn it! I hate those people…I think you should really send this to them.
September 14th, 2007 at 7:28 am
Argh! Maybe you should show up to CPR class with all five kids… and then ask them why they aren’t providing on-site childcare like they said they would. Fight fire with fire!
September 14th, 2007 at 9:21 am
I just gotta say that if all states run their programs this badly, it’s easy to see why there is always as ad in the paper recruiting foster parents. Sheesh.
September 14th, 2007 at 9:34 am
Oh my. With DFS like this who needs enemies?
Beverly
September 14th, 2007 at 9:53 am
Dear Baggage:
It’s me… your friendly DFS worker… Thanks for your letter! We know you appreciate getting paid just as much as we do (even though we get more money and you do 98% of the work)!
About that $1500.00… Yeah. You need to file a written complaint… We’ll try to get around to getting it to the right people for us, and they’ll try to get around to getting it to the right people from them… Until then, sorry to say… you’re tough outta luck! Suck it up, take a loan, do some more work. Hey, being broke is what parenting is all about eh?
Tell those kids of yours to stop wanting the mall. Things like that, you just can’t afford. Try Walmart, Target, or the thrift shop. It’s what quite a few other parents do.
Your friendly, loving caseworker,
DFS
September 14th, 2007 at 9:53 am
PS: Sorry… Had to do it…
September 14th, 2007 at 10:21 am
*snicker*
I’m picturing you saying all this as you use your badass marine training to do some “stress positions” on them.
That should get the message across nicely.
September 14th, 2007 at 11:50 am
LOL… I dare you to mail that! (Hmm maybe you better mail it anonymously…)