Family Board
Wanted to post a little bit about our house rules and chore system.
Figured I would start with chores.
I have started using a system called Motivated Moms. It cost like $4 for the program.
You get a sheet for each week that specific tasks to do each day. I like it because it doesn’t take long to get the things done and if you do it each day, you tackle the cleaning things in your house like mopping and cleaning the bathroom and all. It even tells you to clip the kid’s nails which is good for me because I used to forget.
On the side is the daily chore list and this is what we used to make our chore system. I do all the laundry for the house because I am very particular about laundry. I don’t like my clothes being washed with the kid’s clothes or towels. (I’m a little OCD about this for some reason.) Everyone is in charge of their beds. Bubba and Snowbaby help me do theirs. I also cook dinner, but sometimes people help or they cook.
Callie, Izzy and Bug all get a weekly allowance. They are required to do three chores a day, plus each kid has one day (M, W, or F) when they clean out the van. The nine chores that they rotate on are feed the bird, clean the counters, load the dishwasher, clean the highchair, sweep, clean the table, vacuum the living room and guest bathroom, empty out the trash in the bathrooms and laundry room and take the trash to the dumpster, and clean the sink.
The chores rotate everyday and are listed on the family board. Each person also has a spot where I check off if they did their chore.
Now, there also is a spot where their allowance can increase or decrease. If they don’t do their chores or they don’t do them correctly, they lose a dollar. For instance, last night Bug told me her chores were done so she could watch TV, but when I checked she hadn’t done them at all. So she lost a dollar off her allowance. That dollar was now available to be earned. Callie and Izzy did Bug’s chores and each earned an extra fifty cents. They also are allowed to sell their chores. So if Callie doesn’t want to do her chores, she can lose a dollar off her allowance and Izzy could do them and earn her dollar.
Money is also lost for behavior problems. If you break a house rule, money gets deducted off your allowance. This actually is a good system because it keeps me from getting frustrated. I just deduct the money and am done with it.
The other thing on the family board is the food spot. Every child is required to come to the table at dinner and they are required to eat what we are having. Except that children who are 15 and older are allowed to not eat the family meal twice a week, and children younger than 15 are allowed to not eat the family meal once a week. If they take their non-family meal option, then they can have leftovers, cereal, salad or PB&J.
Since I started this program, it has pretty much eliminated the struggles I was having with getting people to eat. The kids also are required to keep their rooms somewhat neat. If they aren’t, they lose $1 for having a sloppy looking room.
I use part of the kid’s DFS money to pay for their allowances. I think it is very important that they get allowances to help them learn how to manage their money. Of course, payday is tomorrow and Bug only has 75 cents left of her allowance because she didn’t do her chores and she had behavior issues. But the bigger girls have all of theirs and are saving to buy pre-paid cell phones.
This goes back to what I said yesterday. I stress about money, but we aren’t nearly as broke as some people. My bills are paid, we have food, we have a vehicle. We don’t have a ton of extra money and things get tight sometimes. We could afford to go to a movie, but we can’t go to DisneyWorld. I could buy a purse at Walmart, but I can’t afford a Coach bag. Likewise, I can afford to give the kids small allowances to help them learn the value of money. It also helps me deal with situations where they want me to buy something for them. I can tell them that they can have something, but they need to spend their own money on it.
More on our house rules later.
July 26th, 2007 at 1:59 pm
those sound great. i love the family meal idea and the fact that you can do someone else’s chore to up your allowance. good thinking!! did you come up with this yourself? regardless, it’s a very cool system.
July 26th, 2007 at 2:02 pm
Thanks for sharing!!
July 26th, 2007 at 2:08 pm
I came up with the system, but actually Callie was the one who came up with the selling your chores idea. I added to that the idea that they could take over chores that someone (Bug) neglected to do.
Although it seems like Bug might get the easy way out, she learns natural consequences because then she doesn’t have money to do/buy things that the other kids can.
July 26th, 2007 at 3:39 pm
I think your rules sound very reasonable and flexible. They give the kids alout of options WITHIN the rules. I just started my crew on a token system… I use different colored poker chips, and they earn them for having good behavior and helping out. Brandon earns the most. He earns tokens like crazy! Then when we go to the store or outtings, when they see something special and they want it, they can get it if they have enough tokens!
July 26th, 2007 at 3:41 pm
That’s so cool. It sounds like Bug knows *how* to do the chores, which means eventually, as an adult she’ll be fine to keep her own house, well, she’s making choices (no chores) and “earning” consequences (no money). Good for you. And kudos to Callie for refining the system.
She sounds like such a neat young woman.
July 26th, 2007 at 3:45 pm
That sounds like a great system.
Tell the girls that I love my pre-paid phone. I got the $40 one from T-mobile and love the flexibility of not having to pay a fixed ammount.
If you want more details, feel free to e-mail me.
July 26th, 2007 at 5:40 pm
I find your parenting methods really inspiring, and I’m squirreling away all of this for when Seth is older. I think your methods of teaching the kids to manage money are fantastic and I really wish that someone had used some foresight with me about that and I would be better with money now! You’re doing a good job mum
July 26th, 2007 at 5:41 pm
I love that system — I kind of wish my parents had used it when I was a kid; I could have a earned a LOT doing my brother’s chores (they never got done)!
July 26th, 2007 at 9:32 pm
It sounds great. One question: have you ever had a kid decide that they don’t care about the money and are just going to stop doing chores? I guess having other kids around helps with this - the other kids can pick up the slack to earn more and at the same time make it more painful to not have money when your siblings do. With a single child, especially one with defiance issues, I can imagine a kid just deciding to skip their allowance altogether and leaving you with all the chores yourself.
Like FosterAbba says, I suppose it’s all about currency - literally this time
July 27th, 2007 at 7:38 am
I love your system. I have a suggestion to help the kids realize what they are giving up when they don’t earn the full allowance. Do the payout when all the kids are there, and give like say, Bug, her full amount. She is then required to pay out her deductions herself to the person who earned them. Then she will get the picture of just how much she is losing and it galls the kids to no end to have to give “their” money to another kid.
July 27th, 2007 at 12:59 pm
And about that Coach bag? If you could afford that, you could afford Disney World.. and probably have more fun there than with the Coach bag.
I seriously can’t believe people pay THOUSANDS of dollars on a freakin’ purse!!
And I love your board system… and teaching the girls about money management is huge. My parents never taught me about managing money and I ended up in huge debt that I’m still working my way out of.
July 27th, 2007 at 7:16 pm
Cool system. I too wondered about a child that just elects to give up their money and not do the work…. and then if everyone gets to pay for a movie, do you have to stay home with that one kid and miss the movie yourself? I wonder because I had felt like using systems like this in certain situations, and ended up having the other person just refuse to cooperate or care. On the other hand, my grandmother had a similar system, where they actually got paid for chores, and got their allowance every week, and if you had a sibling finish your job, you got paid for half the job and the sibling for the rest. My grandmother was an orphan at six, a foster child, and often had to work with no benefits I think, and I think she thought she was being fair… but my father STILL complains about how stingy and picky she was to keep a book on chores and earnings when he was a child… and he is 65. eek! I guess there are good sides and bad sides to everything, but I think your system sounds great, esp the flexibility of the meals thing, rotating chores, everyone chipping in, and a weekly allowance. I too am filing away ideas for the future!
July 28th, 2007 at 7:41 pm
We only have on foster child right now, but I am definately going to remember this for when we have more. It seems that anyone who implements this system successfully will also have gather up a fair amount of managerial experience!